Recently had a conversation with a good friend about dating, and it had me curious about how everyone on Beehaw approaches dating. Tell me a bit about how you date! Here’s a few prompts/thoughts I’m curious about:
- How long does it take for you to know if you’re attracted to someone (sexually, romantically, emotionally, shared interests, etc)?
- What do you like to do when you date and does it change depending on how many dates you’ve been on or how well you know the person?
- Once you start dating someone, how long does it take you to understand whether you want to date the person long term or whether it’s not going to work out?
- Do you only date people you meet in real life or do you use dating apps? How do you approach going from stranger to dating them?
- What’s most important in deciding whether you want to date someone? Do they need to have an interest in activities you enjoy, shared values, emotional intelligence, a certain kind of humor, or something else?
- Is there something you don’t understand about dating and want to share your frustration?
Maybe you’re a Demisexual. For me, I can experience initial sexual attraction to people, but I never act on it. But my actual relationships have been similar to you: I knew them first as acquaintances/friends, we’d hang out, then I’d develop an attraction. My longest relationship was that way. We were simply friends for some months. Well, she liked me as I found out later, but I didn’t pick up on it (typical guy). Wasn’t until one evening we were hanging out a restaurant just chitchatting, enjoying each other’s company, that I also noticed how attractive she was and started letting my mind wander to the possibilities. And I had a GF at the time! And that relationship developed a similar way, too.
Maybe? But it doesn’t quite feel right. Not sure how to explain it, though. It’s more that my ability to be attracted to someone is pretty malleable if I like them?