Oof, that’s harsh. I’m glad you managed to trudge through it. It’s not unlike how difficult, if not impossible (and expensive) it is in some states (mine included :/) to get a legal name and/or gender marker changed.

They just gotta make it as hard as they can, don’t they… 🙃

Do they? I guess they’d have to figure out why they’re so set on getting that surgery, if it isn’t a matter of skewed body image. Any treatment is going to have to depend on that, I’d imagine. Has there been research on this subject?

I sincerely doubt a doctor’s first response would be to encourage the patient to get a BBL. Gender-affirming care (specifically here, hrt and surgery) has been extensively scrutinized and researched and has been proven effective for treating gender dysphoria, and other treatments (like conversion therapy) have proven ineffective. As far as I’m aware, the same isn’t true of BBLs and (is there a name for this phenomenon?). From what you said, it sounds like BBLs aren’t nearly as safe as gender-affirming care, so that might make it more difficult to justify. It’s also worth mentioning that gender-affirming care is justified by just how bad the outcomes are without it (e.g. suicide rates, persistent mental health struggles, quality of life). Afaik, similarly negative outcomes haven’t been observed in this case, but please correct me if I’m wrong.

*I’m typing this on my phone, but if you do want sources on the effectiveness and safety of gender-affirming care, effects of conversion therapy, etc., I’d be happy to provide them once I get home.

I just want to point out, gender dysphoria is different from body dysmorphia, though the words look very similar. A person with dysphoria (eg, a trans person) sees their body the way it really is, but is uncomfortable with it. A person with dysmorphia (eg, someone with an eating disorder) sees their body as different than it actually is, and is uncomfortable with that perception.

That said, you can’t effectively treat someone experiencing body dysmorphia the same way you’d treat someone experiencing gender dysphoria, and vice versa.

Just to add, although the US allows informed consent for adults, some of us are still required to do a certain number of months in therapy and/or provide letters from mental health professionals before we can access hrt or surgery, because that’s what some health insurance companies require. Even then, ofc, the option does exist to do informed consent and pay out of pocket.

/s? 🤔

As a gay man- at least in my local community, the loophole does exist, and I’ve heard a good number of queer people use it (though only in conversations with people they know will be comfortable with it). 🤷

I don’t necessarily take issue with it being used in a clinical tone like this. Context is context tho, and I don’t speak for everybody ofc. °⁠_⁠o

Ah well. Thanks!

I don’t get it. What good reason is there for the state to make a law like this?

during the day, when there’s plenty of light anyway

b- because of the sun, no? or is that the joke i’m missing lol

Ah fuck, I worded that poorly. No, talking about it is fine, but thanks for asking! I don’t mean the physical sensation is the same, like how you can feel a bug on your arm. Speaking for myself, it’s like the mental reaction of “ick there’s a bug on my arm, I have to get it off”. There’s no physical itch or tickle on my skin. I was trying to make that comparison because generally when there’s a bug on you, it doesn’t bother you if you don’t notice it, and you might not even realize it’s there for a while. But once you notice it or someone points it out, it’d be hard to just ignore it, even if you couldn’t feel it on your skin at all.

As I’m typing this out, I’m realizing that it’s possible that not everyone experiences quite as strong a reaction to having a bug on their skin that I do, especially as a person with ocd, lmao. But if you do, well, hopefully this helps!

Not the person you responded to, but for me it comes and goes as a result of OCD. It does hurt, but not terribly. To describe the urge, it’s a bit like if there’s a big bug on your arm. Once you notice it, it’s difficult to not immediately swat it away, and until you do get it off, you’re gonna be very aware that there’s a bug on your arm. It’s pretty much the same feeling, just directed toward hair instead of bug.

It might be totally different for other people, but that’s just my experience.

mmmm *⁠.✧ tingles⁠ *⁠.⁠✧

Lmao fair enough

Is there any chance the emojis mean they’re not serious?

But yeah, like others have said, it would be pretty wild if true. I’d definitely read a (fiction) novel with that premise.

asmr

Hey now be nice to fat tony 🗡️

A

the book fair??? mom can I get one of the pointer fingers??? /ref

hey, I’m sorry you’ve been feeling down. I can’t offer a solution, but I just wanted you to know you’re seen. and if you want to talk about it more, absolutely feel free to shoot a message.

fwiw, I absolutely sympathize. I’m a young adult with adhd, and struggling with depression, though the latter is getting better I think. I went pretty quickly from being a “gifted kid” to being what most would consider an underachiever. I don’t, to be clear; I’m proud of where I am, regardless of how it seems to compare to some of my friends. it’s still a mad reality check, though.

on a related note, I left christianity a year ago, and holy fuck has that been an adjustment. most of my optimism was always rooted in religion, and without that worldview, it’s suddenly on me to find new reasons to be even a little hopeful, even to want to be alive. I’m not suicidal, but for a while there I couldn’t say that I wasn’t. I do feel like I’m happy to be alive now, and that’s great, but holy crap this is not as easy as it was when I believed in an all-powerful benevolent god. ah well.

I hope you have a lovely day, but if you don’t, that’s valid too. life isn’t always lovely, and there’s nothing wrong with acknowledging that. there’s nothing wrong with feeling down about it. all we can do is try to support ourselves and one another, y’know?

i’m sorry for the dreams that’ve been taken from you and the injustices you’ve experienced. you deserved better, and so did I, and so did most of us. thank you for being honest about it. 🫂

I mean it probably doesn’t help, but if you’re yelling anything at the sky you’re probably gonna sound a bit crazy /s