shore brought is fine

I want to understand, intrinsically, and be able to manipulate to my liking, all the financial systems of the world.

At worst, I’d quickly become a well-paid accountant. At best, I’d become an extremely talented, untraceable, modern Robin Hood.

I’ve been playing Coral Island and I keep thinking… why am I not playing the superior game?

We can put a comfy sports bra on underneath so we don’t have to deal with the bouncing when we run away.

I’m like the whitest woman I’ve ever met. Maybe if a bunch of us make posters with glitter paint like we’re going to see a boy band and shower him with bras, our odds will go up both that he’ll get one and keep it long enough, and that they’ll assume we’re “harmless.”

…actually if we did the first part we could probably overwhelm them and free him.

On the one hand, fur is murder.

On the other hand, I’d wear almost anything to shoot a Nazi. Hmmm…

Is that you, Dan?

I have some news for you regarding “visibility” of a “maidenhead.”

I’ve got a hot ear!

It’s so crazy how it looks like they want to double-team you but they are legitimately just good friends and it isn’t a weird homophobic thing.

I’m pretty sure that’s not even the same guy.

Same. It’s the same kind of vibe as “everybody poops.”

I was thinking of that guy who raped her multiple times and had HIV. I really need that guy to have more than “some time to think about what you’ve done” because he’d probably jerk off to it. :(

Normally I’m 100% for this, it’s just that this particular case seems so evil and egregious…

Is it? You didn’t use any.

I’m still referring to my need to steal everything that is not both nailed down and on fire.

…nailed down or on fire is fine.

Or hair???

She wouldn’t let the fisherman look in her wooden box, so they came up with this while story about her being a foreign princess, married for convenience, and took an illicit lover, so they killed her lover and put his head in the box and set her to sea.

That is an insane amount of bananas details for “she has a box and won’t let us see what’s inside.”

Fuck I want a cigarette now.

I am absolutely the bunny. Because I’m moisturized and just had my hair done, but I’m also completely done.