• Icaria@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    10
    arrow-down
    5
    ·
    10 months ago

    I think it’s reasonable to look at this sort of thing with suspicion

    I think it’s reasonable to mind your own fucking business. The judging and flimsy excuses to meddle are guaranteed to cause relationship issues for others.

    You act when there’s evidence of abuse, not ‘predictors’. This is fucking twitter/reddit moon-logic where every day 5000 supposed serial killers are identified based entirely upon whether they kicked a dog or left the toilet seat up.

    Think about the likely reasons someone would seek that kind of thing

    This is a stupid assumption in itself. Most people don’t have a wealth of relationship options to choose from. If you’re desperate enough to denigrate yourself using tinder, you’re desperate enough to cast as wide a net as possible and settle for anyone not actively smoking meth.

    • WaxedWookie@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      arrow-down
      7
      ·
      10 months ago

      Take a deep breath, my guy.

      You act when there’s evidence of abuse, not ‘predictors’. This is fucking twitter/reddit moon-logic where every day 5000 supposed serial killers are identified based entirely upon whether they kicked a dog or left the toilet seat up.

      Yeah - the National Institute of Health’s National Library of Medicine is a junk source, but here’s the actual data. Spoiler: it’s a predictor. I think it’s time you calmed down and started acting based on evidence rather than rage and moon logic.

      You also seem to be confusing looking upon something with suspicion and actively intervening - why?

      If you’re desperate enough to denigrate yourself using tinder, you’re desperate enough to cast as wide a net as possible and settle for anyone not actively smoking meth.

      I thought we were dismissing moon logic and deferring to evidence. One in eight people in my country use online dating without controlling for anything - age, relationship status, nothing. Forbes Health state that 52% of American adults that have never been married use online dating, and Statistica report 57.44 million users of online dating in the US in 2022. On the other hand, the NIH report 2.5m Americans have used meth in the past year. Reeeally scraping the bottom of the barrel with over half the available dating pool, eh?

      Are these feels based on your personal experience? You might be able to do better than meth addicts if you calmed down a little. There are plenty of free meditation resources online - it can’t hurt to give 'em a try!

      • Icaria@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        4
        arrow-down
        2
        ·
        10 months ago

        I read this over a couple of times looking for your thesis statement… nope, there wasn’t a point hidden in there anywhere, just poorly-contextualised quoting of statistics, like how you gloss over the very poor success rates on dating apps/sites, and an opening strawman.

        Just a very overwrought u mad troll. Okay, cool, can’t believe I interrupted my movie for a ploy straight out of 2010.

        You also seem to be confusing looking upon something with suspicion and actively intervening - why?

        Because there isn’t a difference. The moment someone falls on the wrong side of a taboo, they’re considered fair game. You’re just doing the work of rationalising it.

        • WaxedWookie@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          arrow-down
          3
          ·
          10 months ago

          I read this over a couple of times looking for your thesis statement… nope, there wasn’t a point hidden in there anywhere

          Did you get as far as the first two sentences from the study? I’ll give them here.

          Adolescent girls with older male main partners are at greater risk for adverse sexual health outcomes than other adolescent girls. One explanation for this finding is that low relationship power occurs with partner age difference

          I’ve brought credible, relevant studies and stats, you continue to defer to feels. “nuh-uh - I am rubber you are glue” isn’t going to cut it. That’s the feels covered, now tell me why you’d type the way you did it you weren’t blinded by rage.

          There’s no difference between looking upon something with suspicion and actively intervening? This is just stupid on the face of it - tantamount to “There’s no difference between investigating someone and executing them.”

          Is your treatment of reasonable suspicion (informed by credible studies) as active intervention, and insistence that you can only date the handful of crackheads in your age group the result of a persecution complex linked with relevant experience?

          • Icaria@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            2
            arrow-down
            1
            ·
            edit-2
            10 months ago

            I think it’s time you calmed down

            rage

            feels

            if you calmed down

            free meditation resources

            you continue to defer to feels

            That’s the feels covered

            now tell me why you’d type the way you did it you weren’t blinded by rage

            Fuck me, you’re tedious and desperate. Oh noes, I swore again, I must be ‘raging’. Absolutely one-note, and about a decade by its best-by date as a troll, let alone a debate tactic. Even if you could get me stirred up, it wouldn’t be an impediment to my reasoning skills or articulation because I’m not a child.

            I’ve brought credible, relevant studies and stats

            …over something that was never a point of contention. You went google-fuing for no other reason than to look like you’ve got something to argue with me about.

            There’s no difference between looking upon something with suspicion and actively intervening? This is just stupid on the face of it - tantamount to “There’s no difference between investigating someone and executing them.”

            No, if we’re going with argument by analogy, what you’re doing is stirring up a witch hunt and then claiming no responsibility when people you’ve enabled drown a bunch of spinsters.

            You don’t look upon a bunch of strangers’ relationships with ‘suspicion’ if you have any fucking concept of pulling your fucking head in and minding your own business. You’re a busybody, a gossip, a meddler. If you want a predictor, try having a healthy relationship with anyone when you’ve got a bunch of twat neighbours looking through your windows and whispering behind your backs. You’re the same kind of arsehole who makes going out in public hell for a lot of mixed-race couples because they get smirks and weird comments about how it must be a ‘mail order bride’ scenario. Like you’re not fighting for some great moral victory here, you just suck.

            • WaxedWookie@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              1
              arrow-down
              3
              ·
              10 months ago

              You go on this diatribe for keeping the data and practicalities in mind when I see a 45 year old guy with an 18 year old as you talk about people afflicted with addiction the way you do? Careful on the high road - I hear it’s precarious up there.

              I’d encourage you to direct your witch hunt nonsense at the NIH. Not much for me to argue, sorry.

              I hope that active imagination of yours is useful in your search for a stable relationship - truly.

              • Icaria@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                2
                ·
                10 months ago

                when I see a 45 year old guy with an 18 year old

                And you just assume it must be an age-gap relationship and start getting icky feelings and start looking online for ways to justify your pearl-clutching and feelings of outrage, when on the balance of probabilities they’re just a father and daughter with a healthy affectionate relationship you never had growing up, and you just have unresolved emotional issues.

                Yeah… ngl, kinda hoped we’d left most of you people behind on reddit.

                • WaxedWookie@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  1
                  arrow-down
                  3
                  ·
                  10 months ago

                  Yeah - fuck me - I find incest to be a problem too - for all the same reasons and a handful more. Are you going to suddenly start clutching your pearls at that one?

                  • Icaria@lemmy.world
                    link
                    fedilink
                    arrow-up
                    2
                    arrow-down
                    1
                    ·
                    10 months ago

                    Who said anything about incest? Fuck me, I was on the money. You came at me with a bunch of trolling crap and accusations of ‘rage’, yet you may legit need help.